Recent Activity

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  Getting Older.

  A kind-hearted fellow was walking through Central Park in New York and was astonished to see an old man, fishing rod in hand, fishing over a beautiful bed of flowers....

  "Tch Tch!" said the passer-by to himself. "What a sad sight. That poor old man is fishing over a bed of flowers. I'll see if I can help."

  So the kind fellow walked up to the old man and asked, "What are you doing, my friend?"

  "Fishin', sir."

  "Fishin', eh? Well how would you like to come have a drink with me?"

  The old man stood put his rod away and followed the kind stranger to the corner bar. He ordered a large glass of beer and a fine cigar.

  His host, the kind fellow, felt good about helping the old man, and he asked, "Tell me, old friend, how many did you catch this morning?"

  The old fellow took a long drag on the cigar, blew a careful smoke ring and replied, "You are the sixth today, sir!"

  Posted 17 Sep 07

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  P.J.O'Rourke

  "Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective."

  Posted 23 Sep 07

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  Dave Barry

  "Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down."

  "Bill Gates is a very rich man today... and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions."

  Posted 23 Sep 07

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  Best Jokes

   AN APPEAL:
  

  Muto is a Malawaian  orphan who gets up at dawn each morning and walks 5 miles to and from school everyday. This takes him four hours each day and cuts into the time he has taking care of his two younger sisters.  

  With your help of just $2 a month we can buy a whip and make the lazy batsard run to school.

  Posted 14 Jul 07

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  Who wins?

  Nerd loses

  Microsoft loses anti-trust appeal

  Microsoft has lost its appeal against a record 497m euro (£343m; $690m) fine imposed by the European Commission in a long-running competition dispute.

  The court has upheld a landmark commission decision to give consumers more choice in software markets

  BBC report

  Posted 19 Sep 07

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  Intelligence

  Some intelligent people speak:

  

  Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
  Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever,"
  -- Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest

  Posted 12 Sep 07

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  Things That Never Happened On Star Trek

  21. Troi says she knows what is going on without any qualifying statements.

  22. Troi never said  "I don't know Captain"

  23. Worf fixes a personal problem  with something other than an application of Klingon culture.

  24. Someone tells Riker that jazz doesn't actually appeal to everyone. 

  Posted 13 Jul 07

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  Accidental ads

  You have to love India.

  Posted 10 Aug 07

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  What not to put in your resume

  Someone I was interviewing once, wrote on their CV that their reason for leaving was that they didn't get on with their former employer. I asked why this was so and she said she wasn't really sure because she wasn't there often enough to understand the reasons for the antagonism.

  Posted 31 Jul 07

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  the many uses of Post-it notes

  Post-It notes can also be used, in an emergency, as processed cheese slices.

  Just as plastic wrapped processed cheese slices can be used (with the aid of a white-board marker and some pritt) as re-usable Post-It notes.

  Posted 14 Jul 07